She's his yellow brick road leading him on

I've never had a heart so full.
I feel great, last night I came out of the shower in my bath robe..
stood in the middle of our frozen drive way naked with my arms wide open smiling at the moon.
Sometimes I feel so full, full of what I'm not sure, life maybe.
it's only lasts for short periods of time, like my moods.
Usually it comes with the weather.
When the moon smiles back at me I hear whispers of organ music and a flute, I also smell green beans, and lilac's, but I think that's just the cold.
When I was a kid my dad would leave us for six months at a time.
I put his empty bottle of old spice under my pillow and pasted a tiny picture(the only one I had) of him and me on a mountain top with our hands in the air.
Me and Seth would cry to sleep listening to the song(which I now dub the worst song ever)
"Thank you daddy for your love, thank you daddy for your care.
I still feel your loving arms, closer then when you were here."

I thought the wall was my only friend and I'd hug it no matter how moldy it was.
Daddy was never around for long enough even though I have spent years with him.
I liked it when he'd get sick and have to spend a few days in bed. Not because I wanted him to be sick, or wanted to hear the loud moans of "Beoky des".
But because he'd grow a soft orange beard that I loved, but which he never kept.
God, if daddy dies I'll miss him so much, I wish he'd go to the doctor more often.
He can never possibly imagine how much I love him.